Grinded to be shine, Amin..

I’m backt to my old blog! :)

Ini adalah blog pertama saya yang saya punya jaman kuliah, lalu pindah ke domain lain dan akhirnya balik lagi kesini waktu blog terakhir saya di M*ltiply ditutup.

Fakta yang pasti juga dirasakan semua orang pas buka tulisannya dulu adalah “ih gue alay juga ya dulu” :))

At least that’s my opinion seeing my old blog. Hahaha

Anyway, tulisan pertama saya di blog baru saya ini sayangnya agak berbau curcol. (Mungkin) sedikit galau, tapi intinya saya nulis Cuma ingin menyalurkan hobi, pikiran, perasaan, dan mudah-mudahan bisa diarahkan kepada hikmahnya. Yaiya jadi ga semata-mata curcol sampah. Hehe

Trust…

That’s the most important thing in relationship…

Calling back few months ago when ‘Yin’ and ‘Yang’ broke their relationship, cause of some trouble. At that time, Yang told her that he will still struggle for her, for their relationship. But at the same time, they face another problem that Yin hadn’t seen before. Yang became very jealous (if Yin can’t say very very jealous) with Yin and her friend, just call him “X”. Yin should easily ignore Yang ‘s jealous right? Since they weren’t couple anymore. But Yin always think to give Yang chances since Yang always promise he will change. Ok, Yin and X are partner in their work. So their job often require them to work together. Even X’s girlfriend is Yin’s best friend, so they often go for lunch together. But what do Yang afraid of? Many times Yin said that X is just her friend, he has a girlfriend already. Even he said he love Yin and Yin said “no”.. then so what???

Did Yin never feel jealous to Yang? ever. When they were still a couple, Yin ever jealous to Yang and his friend, just call her “Y” cause Yin ever see Yang was being teased by his friend when there was Y around them. Did Yin get jealous? Yes! But then she can control her feeling since Yang told her it was nothing. Until when Yin know Y message Yang, Yin get jealous, but still, she can trust Yang, seeing the message didn’t contain any romance.

Two months passed, after Yang asked Yin to be together again. Yin refused since she look Yang never truly change. He even get more and more jealous. Yin even said “I can control my feeling, I don’t get jealous with you and Y, why you can’t also do the same thing? Don’t get jealous with me and X”. Yang replied “It’s different, Y and I are nothing, we don’t have any special relationship. But X is too much often with you”. Two months after Yang suddenly act like he never knew Yin, pretend he didn’t look Yin if they meet. What’s wrong?

But after few days later Yin see Yang slowly act nice towards her, Yin heard that Yang is now approaching another girl.. it’s fine since they are both single, but what make Yin so hurt is.. Yang is pursuing “Y”.

See? What the hell did Yang said before: replied “It’s different, Y and I are nothing, we don’t have any special relationship. But X is too much often with you” ???

The fact is now,, Yin and X still be friend cause they truly friend! Even Yang never trust Yin about it. But Yang and Y ????

Ok, Yin won’t prejudice too much badly. She thought maybe Yang and Y become closer in the past two months, after Yang really stop fight for Yin. But it means he directly change his heart into another girl? Not long after he just asked Yin to be his girlfriend again? Yes, Yin just can think maybe this what is called ‘man behaviour’, easily forget and switch to another girl. Sigh!

And, again, why he must choose Y? (Oh, I forgot to state that Yin, Yang, X, and Y are all coworker and in the same floor). Did he get amnesia with his statement “It’s different, Y and I are nothing, we don’t have any special relationship. But X is too much often with you”??

Did he ever consider about Yin heart? They are all in the same environment! Yah.. you can imagine how Yin will see them frequently.

The dark side of Yin even speculate, or did Yang was lying to Yin all this time? How long did they get closer? Y’s friend said that Yang has been approached Y many times intensely. Did Yang just feel pity to Yin so he said they were nothing?

Or let say if Yang really get closer with Y after he broke up with Yin (in this condition Yang has a right), but why did he still struggle for Yin? (ok, maybe he still love Yin), but then why did he dare to ask Yin to avoid from X????? doesn’t it sounds so SELFISH??

Yin has no idea, really no idea. It’s hurt. Yes, it’s better to know now rather than if she already get more serious with Yang. Yin only can think God is so much so much love her, still love her so much so that He shows Yin all these things.

But yes, it’s a deep hurt.

Yin knows that God already has a more more beautiful plan for her. He is now preparing Yin, train Yin to be a better woman and will give her that rewards.

Jewelry shine after being grinded…

“I know You have beautiful plan for me God, but this hurt me deeply.. You are, the heart owner..please heal my heart, take this pain away, take this ‘hate feeling’ away” Yin whispers, “Even if Yang was lying to me, You never sleep.. You know and will reply exactly for what people did.. I trust you..” :'(



Saya berharap tulisan ini bisa terus saya simpan kelak sampai saya punya anak nanti..hehe.. jadi kalau nanti saya punya anak dan dia sudah besar saya bukan hanya bilang ‘boleh atau tidak’, tapi ada alasan atau pertimbangan buat dia (udah kejauhan aja mikir nya,, gpp lah ya segala sesuatu kan harus di prepare..Hahaha)